a rare and precious lovesickness

Papaji: From where has this desire 'I want to be free' arisen? This desire is a beautiful desire, and it is one which is rarely expressed. When you were growing up, how many people talked about this desire to you? When you went to restaurants with your friends and relatives, what did you talk about? Mostly each others' problems: divorces, families, relationships, jobs, personal dramas. Did you ever sit down with a member of family and hear him or her say, 'I am looking for freedom and I am desperate to get it. How much longer do I have to wait? It did not happen today. When will it happen?' Did you ever participate in conversations of this kind?

Q: Not very often.

Papaji: [laughing] I think you are exaggerating. This is such a rarely expressed sentiment, I doubt you heard it even once while you were growing up. I am not talking about some intellectual discussion in which two people exchange ideas on what freedom might be and how it might be attained; I am speaking of two lovesick people who are hurting inside because they cannot find a way to become one with freedom, their beloved. Many people speak about this, but how many of them are actually suffering inside because they cannot reach this elusive goal? That's very, very rare and very, very precious. This desire comes from a place that is not controlled by the mind. Mind cannot absorb or digest a desire like this, but at the same time it cannot stop it from arising and demanding your attention. When this desire for freedom makes you sick with longing for it, it has the power to bring about that freedom that it desires so badly. Just want it badly enough.

~ The Fire of Freedom, edited by David Godman